Livin’ Covida Loca
Gosh, yes. This is all much easier for introverts, isn’t it? All you have to do is stay in and not talk to people, after all. It’s just like heaven. And don’t forget all of us who were already on Universal Credit, Tax Credits and ESA. We didn’t even notice any changes, except that now we get more money! Thank you Covid-19, for improving our lives, that were so easy anyway. We actually have a lot of sympathy for all the people suddenly without work, and even all the people furloughed. I remember how hard it was when I lost my job, after all. I too was suddenly cut off with no income and was ill at the time so I did have to stay in my home, and had to wait ages for my Universal Credit claim to come through. Honestly, I understand what it’s like not to be able to work when you want to, to have that taken away, with no end in sight. Not on full pay, obviously, but, you know…
It’s not like many introverts — and for a start, let’s make clear that people aren’t actually divided into extroverts and introverts by the way; individual people have all shades of social needs and wants — it’s not like many ‘introverts’ don’t just have things like social anxiety, but general anxiety, depression, panic disorder, agoraphobia, and all kinds of other marvellous co-morbid conditions. Telling them the outside world is poisoned does not mean they ‘find lockdown easier’, it makes it infinitely more stressful.
Even I was guilty of thinking, ‘hell, we got this’, at the start of lockdown, mind you. We’ll be able to give the muggles some tips on how to survive with no money and no food and living in a work free world. This is our land now. Then, the middle classes went out and bought everything before our UC came in, and we were actually running out of stuff that we needed, and I realised it was never going to be our world. “How can anyone be expected to live on so little!” people wailed, and the government agreed, and no one paused for a moment to look at the people stood there going, hello, we’ve been here, ‘living’ on this for years, right in front of your fucking eyes. But hey, just instantly raise UC now that people who matter have to live on it. Jesus wept.
The poor and the sick and the underclasses, the meek and the ‘introverts’ and those without work who knew the government weren’t ever going to protect them anyway, listened to all the conflicting government advice and you can be sure they stayed in their homes. They heard about the police stopping people in the streets and checking their shopping for ‘essentials’, and moving people on from benches even though they were disabled and tired and just carrying their shopping home, and issuing on the spot fines. They knew it wasn’t Collette in her SUV who was being flagged down on her way to get more sourdough mix and kombucha. What a time to have anxiety! What a time to feel that old paranoia creeping back in. Stay off Facebook, theydies and gentlethem. It’s conspiracy theories a go-go!
What we rely on, as people whose whole world has been our homes, and the small world around them, is the core stability of that world. That stability has gone. The foundations of everything we base our worldview and social mores on has been taken away, and replaced with a kindly dictatorship, run by idiots who seem to have not a clue what they are supposed to be doing — and there’s nothing we can do about it. This is utterly surreal if you think about it for more than five minutes, and I don’t recommend it.
I know, at least we’re not in the US. I’m now convinced the USA is a Netflix Original. Probably by Armando Iannucci if I’m any judge. Every day brings something more profoundly bizarre and unsettling. It can’t be really happening, right? Not even in America would they let the President go on national tv and tell people to inject themselves with bleach. I mean… What? Surely someone should run on and tackle him to the floor at that point? We’re living in a Veep/Thick of It crossover ep, and I don’t appreciate it.
I hope lockdown does really lead to some profound societal changes, when it comes to rent protection, working from home, sick pay, Universal Credit and how we pay the people we now do hopefully recognise as essential workers. But if you’re thriving under lockdown it’s because you are privileged. It’s that simple. It’s because of your safety net, not your mind set. So enjoy getting time to write your novel, and do creative play with your kids, and enjoy getting to really know yourself, but the rest of us ‘introverts’ are stuck inside, working on our government sponsored agoraphobia, thanks.
